The ASS is Back!

Hazy Day AssThe Christmas Ass was a little late this year,
He had a hard time getting his little ass in gear!
Blame the bottles of Crown, or the long hard days,
But the past 11 months was nothing but a haze!

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Book Review ~ “The Light Between Oceans” by M.L. Stedman

light-betweenMy Rating / 4.5 Stars

“The Light Between Oceans” is the first novel M. L. Stedman has written and it is an extraordinary story of the difference one decision can make; how the future must be lived and the past cannot be changed, and how love can blur the boundaries between right and wrong.

I liked how the author recognizes that so much of life unfolds in shades of gray, not simple black and white. Even the Lighthouse almost become a character, which is stationed between two very different oceans, the Great Southern Ocean (cold and treacherous) and the Indian Ocean (warm and calm), is named for Janus, the two faced Roman God of doorways, “always looking both ways, torn between two ways of seeing things.”

This idea of seeing things black, white or grey is mirrored throughout the story. The idea of honoring those who came home from the war but ignoring the scars, the idea of nature versus nurture and the love between husband and wife, parent and child, especially mother and child.

The story takes place after the first World War in Australia, after four harrowing years on the Western Front, Tom Sherbourne returns to Australia and takes a job as the lighthouse keeper on Janus Rock. Janus is an isolated island, where the supply boat comes once a quarter and shore leaves are rarely granted. Before heading to Janus, Tom meets Isabel, a young, audacious women, who eventually becomes his wife and solitary partner at the Lighthouse. Years later, after two miscarriages and one stillbirth, the grieving Isabel hears a baby’s cries on the wind. A boat has washed up onshore carrying a dead man and a living baby.

When the choice is made to keep the baby, instead of reporting the tragedy it eventually has a devastating effect that reaches far beyond the craggy shore line of Janus Rock!

Tom, who retreated from war to find peace in the solitude of the Lighthouse, miles from anyone, is soon confronted with conflict on a deeper and more intimate level than those he faced in war.

Isabel, who has had so much taken from her, the loss of her brothers at war and her three babies, see this “miracle child”, as a way to bring back a balance to her and Tom’s life. However, she failed to see the unbalanced effect, this decision would have on others, especially Hannah, the child’s birth mother, and the little one, Lucy.

The eventual reunion of birth mother and child takes place, however not smoothly. At one point Hannah makes a decision to give the child back to Isabel, “for the good of the child.” This reminded me of the bible, 1 Kings 3:25, the woman that loved the child did not want it to suffer, therefore was given the child. I felt that Tom decision not to report the death of the father and the discovery of the child, was for the same reason – the love for his wife. But ultimately, he could no longer live with his choice. I do feel that Isabel, while she had moments of regret and sorrow for Hannah’s loss, could have lived her life very happily with her original decision.

Putting aside what I thought was the morally right decision – I found myself developing empathy for each character. They are so well defined that, at one point or other throughout the book, I that sympathize with each of them and their internal struggle to do what’s right versus want. I especially like the development of some of the minor characters, Ralph, Bluey and Gwen to name a few.

A good story, a bit slow to start, but definitely picks up, I did find myself crying through the last 50 or so pages!

My favorite quote ´”You only have to forgive once. To resent, you have to do it all day, every day. You have to keep remembering all the bad things.”

The Christmas ASS ~ Dec 26, 2014 ~ Goodbye

It’s December 26 and ASS’ job has ended,
Time to leave those that he has befriended!
Santa has called him back to the pole,
Twenty five days of spying has taken its toll!

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The Christmas ASS needs a little R & R,
But don’t worry too much – he will never be far!
You’ll never know when he may pop in for a spell,
To check in and make sure you are all doing well!

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Christmas ASS wishes you peace, love and much more,
Laughter and happiness and smiles galore!
May your days be cheerful and future so bright,
Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!!

The Christmas ASS ~ Dec 25, 2014 ~ Christmas Ball

Christmas Ball (Sung to the tune of Miley Cyrus Wreaking Ball)
Watch THe Christmas ASS’ Music Video at http://youtu.be/cUuLhnHRXxU

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Oh silent night, the stars so bright
Sugar plums dancing in my head,
The carolers sing, the bells will ring
The kids are tucked up in their beds!

Don’t you ever pout, don’t you even shout
Cuz ASS is watching you,
You can’t even cry, and I’ll tell you why
He sees everything all that you do!

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He came in like a Christmas ball
He dressed up like a Santa Claus,
All he wanted was to deck the halls
All he wanted was to he-e-e-lp you!
Yeah he-e-e-lp you!

The tree is bright, I’ve strung the lights
Pour a cup, full of good cheer,
The stockings are hung, the bells have rung,
Don’t forget to leave Santa a beer!

Don’t you ever say he was naughty,
ASS was always good
He is watching you, everything you do
So you should be too,

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He came in like a Christmas ball
He dressed up like a Santa Claus,
All he wanted was to deck the halls
All he wanted was to he-e-e-lp you!

He came in like a Christmas ball
He dressed up like a Santa Claus,
All he wanted was to deck the halls
All he wanted was to he-e-e-lp you!
Yeah – he-e-e-lp you!

I was my job to spy on you
I just wanted you to be your best,
To let Santa know that you’ve good
I didn’t mean to be so obsessed
I was my job to spy on you
I just wanted you to be your best,
To let Santa know that you’ve good

Don’t you ever say he was naughty,
ASS was always good

He came in like a Christmas ball
He dressed up like a Santa Claus,
All he wanted was to deck the halls
All he wanted was to he-e-e-lp you!

He came in like a Christmas ball
He dressed up like a Santa Claus,
All he wanted was to deck the halls
All he wanted was to he-e-e-lp you!
Yeah – he-e-e-lp you!

The Christmas ASS ~ Dec 23, 2014 ~ A Bell Rings

Christmas ASS continued his job, he was on mission,
Watching over the family had become quite the tradition!
SANTA was proud and of the hard work ASS had done,
And came up with a plan for our special little one!

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If you are an ASS, you have only one true desire,
To be all that you can be, until you can’t get any higher!
To show Santa that you’re worthy of respect and praise,
And if you’re very lucky, your ASS will get a raise!

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Santa called his friend Clarence and asked for a favor,
Clarence said it was possible, but would require a waiver!
So they both went up higher, to see the King of Kings
And now every time you hear a bell, an ASS gets his wings!

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The Christmas ASS ~ Dec 22, 2014 ~ Making Amends

ASS had been bad, at least that’s what Santa said,
ASS was sent without dinner, straight to his bed!
“You’d better think hard, about what’s taken place”
Said Santa Claus with a stern look on his face!

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So ASS sat in the corner, and thought really long,
About all that he did and all that went wrong!
He would be extra good to redeem his good name,
Damn all those girls, it was them who’s to blame!

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With nary a word, he did all his chores,
Washed all the dishes and swept up the floors!
With a pen in his hand and regret in his heart,
He wrote Santa a letter, promising a fresh start!

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The Christmas Ass ~ Dec 21, 2014 ~ Mr. Gray

The morning after can be such a pain
ASS had to do the walk of shame!
What had he done, who did he kiss,
Would it get him on the naughty list?

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Saturday night the ASS let his hair down,
What he had done would make Santa frown!
ASS thought to himself and then he smiled,
It was those girls that had gone wild!

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So he stepped over the line, he’d made a mess,
But even the ASS had to let go of stress!
ASS needs a good spanking, but he liked it that way,
If you look very closely, ASS is Fifty Shades of Gray!

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