The ASS awoke with a migraine, overdosed on holiday cheer,
To do his Christmas duty, he better get his ASS in gear!
A handful of magic pills would be the proper cure,
To get himself back on track, to be innocent and pure!
The kids would never know, that he wandered of his course,
That Moose had lured him, into that dark, dark force.
His heart was full of Christmas, his head still full of beer,
The ASS just needed time to regain his holiday cheer!