Cliques – aren’t we supposed to outgrow these by the time we graduate high school, or at least university? Sadly I have found that this is not the case; there are neighborhood cliques, wife cliques, mom cliques and work cliques.
I was a nerd – but because of my sister’s status as a “cool kid” I was propelled passed the ranks and got a first class ride into coolness (somewhat).
Trust me, my nerdiness was always under the surface and at times shone through brightly like a beacon in the night! I was always a little chunky, uncoordinated and carried home a stack of books each day so that I could reach perfectionism (I never made it!)!
But I was voted Ms. Plum (trust me – quite the honor), was a cheerleader and dated a football player and musician – none of that would have happened if I had entered high school as an only child. I would have gone though school quietly and unnoticed – but I loved being “in the middle” ~ somewhat a nerd and “faux cool.”
Well you know what they say – “All’s well that ends well,” right?
Not quite – the cliques and clichés kept right on coming…..
Even as parent’s its there – you become the parent’s of the preps, jocks, cool kids, and nerds. I was a band mom – lower on the scale than a hockey/football mom but higher on the scale than a parent of that “bad kid” – LOL.
I would sit in the hot band booster trailer shelling out hot dogs and greasy pizza to make enough money to buy the band a new music book while it was the job of the hockey/football mom’s to sweet talk local business’ into handing over huge amounts of money to the sports department! Which they usually did quite willingly – screw the music, art & engineer department!
(Editor’s note: this is a totally biased outlook from a band mom – I’m sure sports mom’s worked just as hard – but it’s my story so I get to relay it my way!)
Military life, not unsurprisingly, lends it’s self to cliques – Officer vs. Enlisted. Hell, I was once brought into a Commander’s office and told I couldn’t have a business relationship with a very talented young lady because her husband was an Officer and mine was Enlisted. God forbid the two should mix!. Needless to say this made me want it even more and we had a successful small business until, as always in the military, orders came down we both had to move on.
…… What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger!
By the time we are grown up and full steam into a career, one would hope that cliques would not interfere but unfortunately that is not true! You still have the preps, jocks, cool kids and nerds etc. but it’s a little different –they are now CEOs, white collar, blue collar, good ole boy network, jokers (the “fun guys”) and stiffs (who “play by the rules”).
Once again, like in high school, I find myself falling in-between! My personality and career choice (marketing) lends me to be on the creative and fun side – but I’m still that nerd at heart – I still play by the rules and have a hard time understanding those who don’t – after all why are the rules in place if they are not to be followed! I still carry stacks of work home to try to get it right and reach perfectionism (still way out of my reach). So I don’t always fit in but I have a tendency to “float” – a skill I learned in high school!
Will cliques ever go away, probably not – I’m sure that years from now when I’m old and my kids put me in a home, I will find cliques within the walls of the Nursing Home – those who have teeth, those who don’t, blue hair vs. grey hair (or no hair), those who need Viagra, and those who don’t!
So there it is … lesson learn – in experience comes wisdom and with wisdom comes experience!
Fear not I have decided to start my own clique – “the over forty, slightly overweight, sarcastic, don’t fuck with me” clique! Anyone want to join??
All is fair in love and war, what goes around comes around.
But most of all remember, we’re not laughing at you, we’re laughing with you and laughter is the best medicine!